December 23, 2006
The intelligence you posses I gave to you, and today I claim it for my service because I want you to be a valuable instrument for my glory. My holy word will dissipate all of your doubts, study it with responsibility and apply yourself to the knowledge of my doctrine, and prepare yourself to give a compelling testimony to all of the youth of these times. Amen
Superintendent Joel Mondejer
As of now, what is it I understand or think about my message….
The truth is I don’t remember ever feeling intelligent, I do not know what God is referring to. All I know is that I will trust in him to be able to understand these first words.
I’ve always wanted to be a useful instrument in God’s hands but I have learned it’s not always in the way that I have wanted.
One of my biggest battles, is making myself read the Bible responsibly … at the start of my spiritual life I could solve all things with asking God to allow the answer to my question or doubt, appear in the pages in which I opened the Bible to. We’ve heard the story of the man that did what I was doing, and got the message to go hang himself. He opened the bible and where ever he placed his finger that had to be God’s word for his life. That is not what God had intended. Now God requires me to do more than just randomly open the Bible. The battles and trials are more difficult, and to be able to come out victorious I have to know more of God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit.
Doubt!!! It’s ever present in my life. I have now learend to thank God for all the doubts the enemy and life placed in my life. Little by little each doubt became an impulse for me to get closer to God. In these present days there are moments that my doubts surround me and make me feel like I’m sinking. My soul always remembers that Jesus will come to my rescue! Only praying, fasting and reading the Bible will I be able to have victory over my doubts.
The Doctrine… I ask God to help me understand this part of the message. At times I get confused with what is the doctrine of God and what are the rules that our church has. Our church has certain rules that I am not completely in agreement with … God help me understand and accept his will. I ask God to help me pray for our leaders and not criticize them.
I ask God to help me understand the different parts of our doctrine. I do not want to only know of them, and repeat the verses that support each one, like a robot. I want to understand them completely, believe they are absolute truth and have them engraved in my heart. The truth is that in these days it can be easy to get confused if we let ourselves get bombarded by what everyone else says and believes. Everyone has their own bible verses to support what they believe. That is why I have had and still have problems in either accepting or understanding certain doctrinal points. Three examples that I have battled with in understanding are divorce, driving on the Sabbath, having images. I share that I have battled with these points (I know some may be shocked and probably want to criticize etc) because in my conversations with other youth I have learned that many feel like they are the only ones who have doubts about our doctrine. Not everyone has been able to find help amongst the spiritual leaders that surround them. Some of them don’t speak up about what they think or understand because they are afraid of getting criticized and shuned for having thoughts that don’t go according to the rest. If the youth of our church can’t speak freely how can we begin to help each other grow.
Personal testimony: As a child I did not understand why White and Black magic where both considered evil. I thought God had allowed white magic to exist so that we could use it to fight those who used black magic. I wanted to learn “the art” of white magic. After seeing the reaction of some of the people who I shared my thoughts with I decided not to tell anyone else what was going on in my head. Their reactions and comments did not help me understand the truth and they only hurt me. In my head I started to think that these people did not understand what I spoke of or that they probably did not poses the ability to do magic and so they reacted the way they did. Satan tried to wrap me up and pull me away from God using these situations. In my head the battle continued. Finally God allowed me to find the person who could help me understand and help me see the truth over this topic. This person took the time to figure out a way to speak to me, so that I could confide in them and freely speak. I learned the correct way on why magic, any kind, went against God’s plan. Even now I know I can go to this person and ask for help when I need help understanding the why of a certain belief or situation. I thank God everyday for allowing this person to be in my life.
In these days it can be easy for someone to get pulled away from the correct path if they aren’t deeply rooted in the truth. The enemy has many tools to fuel our insecurities and doubts. That is why I ask God to help me know more about His truth, His doctrine so that I can help others the way I was helped.
“Compelling Testimony” some of you have probably already read my FB post under notes titled “My Testimony” I believe God has more for me to testify about. The truth is I prefer to be in a spot or position where I am not the center of attention. I rather help the leader, and not be the leader. That is why I ask God to help me with my doubts, fears, nerves, and timidity. I want to be able to share with others what I have learned as I walk with God. I want to freely testify of what God has done in me without being afraid or worried of what others may think.
I ask for your prayers so that the message given to me by the Holy Spirit becomes a reality in my life every day.